This blog is prompted by a Facebook member M.M. and many others over time with similar quests.
These questions arise: Can the other party expect trust to be reinstated just because you have forgiven them? Can the relationship go back to be the same? How do I know if I have finished forgiving or is there more to do? How do I know if I have take ownership of all % of my weight in the situation?
Sage simple and short reply:
My intuition and “Council” guides collectively tell me this:
- No one can expect trust(ed) it must be earned both ways. It may be given without being “earned” if one has an open heart and truly cleared/healed and let go of the past. This also calls for healthy boundaries… healthy also means clear to all parties. Boundaries can be gentle yet firm…not harsh or demanding.
- “Going back” are key words. Best not to go backwards. The “old same” was a problem coming to a head. Best to have a new fresh relationship since all parties could have grown with better understanding, perspective and forgiveness.
- If both parties have grown then they would not benefit by going back but by being in the now/today of who they are.
- If the issue(s) continue to come to mind is not neutral or is causing discomfort or frustration, then it is not yet finished. The root cause may need to be revisited.
- If you are cleared of any “weight” or responsibility for your part then most likely your mind and heart “feel” free and light. If not, there is often a heaviness or constant “nagging or resentment” somewhere. Again, revisit root causes.
- Feel the feelings and label them. Use your techniques to clear/heal these labels as root causes. When the feelings become “light” or gone or diminished – then most likely they are cleared and the energy is “dis-charged”. Then all “charges are dropped” and usually disappear or forgotten now.
Hoping this is helping your quests about forgiveness.
Sagementor33@gmail.com. Facebook: Sage LeSage